Dear Anna...Am I feeling Intuition or Fear?
I’m struggling with whether to make the decision to move across the country to do what’s best for my husband being closer to his kids. The town we live in now is one of the safest in the country, with many other benefits. A move would be seen as a ‘down-grade’ from the outside, it doesn’t make logical sense. But I feel a pull to make that decision anyways because feel like there’s something more for me if I go.
I saw that you recently made a series of monumental decisions to return/immigrate to Canada with 2 bio-kids, 2 step-kids & your husband. I guess that was after you made the decision to move to Peru from Canada in the first place! I'd love to learn what lead you to make that decision, then stick with implementing it even when hurdles and fears arose. I don't think I'm there, yet!
I believe that any decision you make, when made from a grounded place of deep-knowing within you, will be the right decision in the long-term. It doesn’t matter what it looks like on the outside. Or the list of pros versus cons, you don’t need to explain it. It doesn’t even need to make logical sense.
When you follow your intuition, you’re often challenged to make scary decisions that don’t make logical sense. And in my experience that was definitely the case. I left jobs that checked-off all the right boxes but didn’t satisfy my soul’s calling. I used my ‘new furniture’ savings to go on a solo-backpacking trip to South America right before my first home purchase was about to close. And, I left it all behind, moved to South America to be with the person I knew was my soul-mate. Then, years later, sold all our belongings and left it all behind again to start a new life together in Canada.
These decisions made no logical sense. The voice of fear crept in hard. However, I decided to following my soul’s calling and intuitive knowing – and I haven’t looked back since.
I’m not fearless, but I’ve learned how to discern the voice of my intuition from the voice of fear. I choose to live in alignment with my intuition instead of being guided by fears.
Know that success is NOT a linear path. The next decision you make may very well be the catastrophic mistake that catapults you to success. When you understand and trust this process, it makes it easier to surf the waves of change and make decisions that feel good and are in alignment with who you are meant to be.
The first step I suggest is to slow-down and tune-in. Some kind of mindfulness practice will help you notice what is really going on in your mind at any given time.
The next step is to learn to discern the voice of fear from the voice of your intuition. Many times, we are confused about which voice it is that we are following. In short, the voice of your intuition is expansive and freeing. When you think of things that your intuition is guiding you to, you feel good, expansive, abundant, and safe.
The voice of fear creeps in and keeps you stuck where you appear to be safe and familiar. It feels scary, anxious, and pressured or forced.
It’s important to listen to the voice of fear, understand where it’s coming from, and decide whether you want to live your life listening to that voice, or not.
Many times, the voice of fear comes from old beliefs we picked up in childhood, past experiences or mistakes, or societal standards that do not serve us anymore. When that is the case, we can choose to let that voice go, and choose our intuition instead. It’s a simple process, but not always an easy one.
Many of the decisions that you make in your blended family won’t make logical sense. Deciding to be with a man who has kids didn’t make logical sense.
But here you are. You did it anyways because you likely followed your heart, you followed your inner-voice. Trust that you’re exactly where you need to be in this moment.
Tune-in, and explore what decision feels more expansive and ‘right’ for you. When fears creep up, explore them and see if they are worth following. Once you learn to listen to your intuition and discern it from the voice of fear, making intuitive decisions becomes second nature! Now, you can live a more purpose-driven life, where ever in the world that may be!
Anna de Acosta is an intuitive guide, life coach for stepmoms, and creator of the Mindful Stepmom guided meditation series, available on iTunes.
Anna teaches stepmoms to tune into and honor their desires, be mindful of their reactions, and act from an emotionally intelligent place in order to live in peace and be the change they want to see in their blended families.
She shares about her life and experience raising a mixed-culture, blended family of six over at her blog, annadeacosta.com.
Have a question you want answered by Anna? Write in to firstname.lastname@example.org with the subject “Dear Anna”.
This information is intended for entertainment purposes only, not meant to substitute legal, medical, or mental health professional advice
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